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The IChing

September 2012

How it helped me

 

 

I was fascinated by The IChing! I just couldn't get enough! I kept trying to read between the lines ... trying to figure out what I was reading ... trying to understand the answer to my query. Funnily enough, the questions I asked were not necessarily related to the death of my son, but were directed more toward my emotional upsets!

It got to the stage where I was using The IChing whenever I was feeling negative about a situation and I could not see a positive solution or path to follow. At first I could not understand the hexagrams, but gradually I began to see a pattern forming - if I was feeling in a particular type of negative mood, then I would receive the same hexagram - regardless of the situation.

And so I realized that by determining what negative emotions are affecting a given situation, one can then determine the hexagram that corresponds with that negative emotion.

All very well to write this down now, but at the time of learning, it was often unbearable because ... I wasn't learning fast enough, or I kept making the same mistakes over and over, or I went off the path or any number of other factors. In essence, I was trying to become a better person within myself - not by conquering my negative traits, but by understanding them and realizing that they are a necessary part of who I am and without them, I would not be able to appreciate my positive traits.

Before I began learning from The IChing, I was a negative person. I was just saying to my sister the other day how I was always unhappy as a child for a whole host of reasons, but this unhappy child grew into an adult who was angry, rebellious and controlling.

Even though I was this negative person, I was capable of giving and receiving copious amounts of 'love', and once I began to learn from The IChing, I realized that here was a map that showed a pathway from my negative to my positive emotions - amazing!!!

Love ...

... was the emotion that I had most difficulty with understanding because it came attached with so many other emotions - the love between a mother and a child (protection, warmth, caring, discipline, sharing, teaching, loss, grief, pain), - the love between a couple (jealousy, hate, anger, adultery, sharing, caring, happy), - the love of yourself (pride, disapproval, oneness, joy), - the love between friends, - the love for your job etc etc - love!

I remember attending a church service one time in my younger years, and we were in the middle of a song of praise when I gazed lovingly upon a picture of Jesus sitting on the desk in front of me. Suddenly, I felt this overwhelming surge of energy like 100% pure love, so strong, that I fell to my knees and began crying. It was electrifying! Our Pastor who saw this event, exclaimed that I had been filled with the Holy Spirit, but I had been filled with the love of Jesus, and that was when I realized that Jesus was 'real'.

The love I shared with my husband was not one of those 'love at first sight' affairs, but rather, it grew from friendship. Our relationship became more serious when my husband began to talk of things spiritual - a subject of which I knew nothing about, and was fearful of, yet secretly, yearning to know more. From that time on, I followed him around like a love-sick school girl hanging on for every word. When he wrote the most beautiful poetry to me, I was on Cloud 9 - so much so, that I was inspired to add further depth, by composing beautiful melodies to compliment and enhance the 'oh-so-cleverness' of those words. Even though we lived in different towns, we still managed to see each other often, but it was the times apart that would find me pining for him like a love-lost puppy.

To me, my husband was soft and gentle, yet strong and forceful. He was sensitive and caring, yet defiant and rebelious. He was loving and giving, yet unyielding - these character traits seemed to be somewhat contradictory and I found that I was always in a state of turmoil in an effort to understand them - thank goodness for The IChing! Whenever we would argue, I would turn to The IChing for understanding and reason. At first my questions were related to a specific incident as it occurred (...'he said then I said then he said, but I know I'm right'...), but after a time I began to see that The IChing was showing the negative emotions involved in the situation, and offering me an alternative path to follow if I wanted a more favourable outcome when such emotions return.

If love is blind, then I most certainly was because in my eyes, he was always right - even when I severed the ties between my sisters, and even when I wouldn't pay the undertaker because he did a shoddy job at dressing my son's coffin, or when I fought against the Crown for my other son for five years regarding his behavioural issues. Thank goodnes for The IChing who, over time, allowed me to open my eyes to other possibilities of handling situations like those above, without using the defiant and rebelious nature that my husband would have me use.

But after eight or nine years of continued arguments and continued use of The IChing - only to end up at square one again, I guess the veil of illusion began to tear and I could see snippets of the truth behind the dusty old curtain - thick with the memories of my time. At this stage I turned around and began to watch the actions of my husband ...

 

Peace and Light

Amelia Robinson

www.myspiritualuniverse.com




















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About Amelia Robinson

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Amelia Robinson

I am the second eldest of five (all girls), and spent most of my growing years on an Orchard, where my father worked. Religion and Spirituality was talked about and sometimes followed, but not persistently. I always felt alone and try as I might, could never seem to find a relationship where I could give my love completely and not get hurt, until I had my children. My aunty once told me that I brought my kids up right because they love and that was the highest compliment anyone could say to me. Still floundering from relationship to relationship in search of 'true love', it wasn't until quite recently that I finally stumbled upon it - love for myself - in all its entirety ... more

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